technocat:

motherfucker what is this shit, sand? fuck sand. i hate sand. thanks, mom. thanks for absolutely nothing, leaving me here on this fucking beach, is that a fucking seagull? oh my god, mom, you suck more than anything has ever sucked. i’m getting to that ocean just so i can urinate on your carapace. i’m gonna urinate on it so hard. fucking sand. i think five of my brothers just got eaten. good, i hated those assholes. i’m coming, mom. you’ve got blood on your flippers, bitch.

technocat:

motherfucker what is this shit, sand? fuck sand. i hate sand. thanks, mom. thanks for absolutely nothing, leaving me here on this fucking beach, is that a fucking seagull? oh my god, mom, you suck more than anything has ever sucked. i’m getting to that ocean just so i can urinate on your carapace. i’m gonna urinate on it so hard. fucking sand. i think five of my brothers just got eaten. good, i hated those assholes. i’m coming, mom. you’ve got blood on your flippers, bitch.

(Source: wolf-teeth, via heydaveheydave)

2 days ago
259,990 notes
tastefullyoffensive:

"My cat frequently acts like she’s a spy whose cover has just been blown." [lexisayok]

tastefullyoffensive:

"My cat frequently acts like she’s a spy whose cover has just been blown." [lexisayok]

5 days ago
9,960 notes

wilwheaton:

sassingintothevoid:

Coffee porn.     (Cinemagraphs and gifs from this cool article.)

AKA Sean Bonner porn.

5 days ago
44,888 notes

luxor1390:

Things that don’t exist 

(via pricklylegs)

5 days ago
73,629 notes